Love Notes

I had a rough night with Booger Head last night. I hate it when my babies get sick. It makes me want to execute whoever introduced those germs to my household...so I was really tired when I was getting the kids assembled this morning for school. Stinky heard me gripe about being really tired and left me a love note on the compy...

Awwww...thanks Stinky! You made my day!

Where Do You Blog?

For now...either here

amid a usually growing pile of papers my children would be mad if they knew I threw away the other day. Where the mouse has started to rub the picture of wood off of the particle board and the usable surface isn't big enough to really be usable.

Or sometimes I get to sit here. I can't sit there today because that would mean moving the laundry which would mean acknowledging the laundry and we aren't speaking right now.

I have grand plans for the first of those two spaces, the second needs paint and some curtains...and a large ottoman covered in the cow print microfiber from Hobby Lobby. It's all on the list...we're baby stepping our way there. Just getting the new furniture took us nine years.

But yeah, the first space...oh I have plans...

In my head I see an L shaped desk with shelves that reach up the wall by the window. The L is large enough that both the desktop and the lappy can sit there and be used comfortably. I'd really love to find a great old door to use as a face for it, so you can't see all the wires and crap when you walk in the front door. Something stained a chocolaty walnut color with antiqued nickel hardware. I see the whole thing in my head...whether or not it'll come to fruition is another thing. Like I said...nine years to new furniture.

Where do you blog?

Friend Makin' Monday...

I saw this on a friend's blog and thought it was really neat, even neater if you follow the link and read up on a few of your favorite blog authors. So here's goes...

I like...quiet. I blame it on the fact that my Dad was in the military and I grew up in base housing, an apartment, and we had to be quiet. I have a really hard time with the noise associated with four children. And video game noise is the worst...

I don't like...green peppers or celery. Or enchilada sauce. Gag.

I love...to come across a really good book. Can't wait for this one to get here...I sure hope it's as good as her other series.

I dream of...I'm with Sami on this one. I dream of order. When my house stays clean and my children stay well behaved and we can all just get along for crying out loud.

I wonder...if I am going to need to take Booger Head to the doctor tomorrow...he's been all stuffy and grumpy all weekend and we're now on day three of low grade feverness. Thank heaven we finally borrowed a swing and got some sleep last night.

I know...that my husband loves me even when I am tired and cranky. Corny though it may sound he really is my best friend and I know I can tell him anything. I know that we are where we should be and we're doing the best that we can.

I went...to the corner to pick the kids up again today. It's been a nice little walk. Heavy on the little. It's like three blocks...but I'm a former couch potato and you have to start somewhere.

I have...the most adorable baby boy ever. I just wanna squish those baby cheeks...

I think...that there is always someone willing to tell you what you are doing wrong and that there isn't anyone more qualified to raise MY children than me.

I plan...on ordering a Bountiful Basket tonight. I hope that we like it as much as we think we will.

I regret...being too tired to do anything this summer. We spent the whole summer at home. Seriously. With the exception of our trip to Utah we didn't go anywhere but the pediatrician and the grocery store. Though we kind of knew that would happen after having a baby two weeks before school got out. Sorry monsters. Next summer promises to be better.

I do...plan on volunteering at the elementary school again this year. I had so much fun getting to know Stinky's teacher last year.

I drink...lots more water than I used to. I got hooked when we were driving, and since Booger Head won't let me have caffeine what's the point of drinking soda. But the lo-cal blue Gatorade is mighty tasty too. I am trying not to "drink my calories."

I wish...I had more time and money and motivation.

I am...always stressing about something. You might call me high strung. But it wouldn't be smart.

I am not...going to pretend to be something I am not for anyone.

I need...to do the laundry before I can leave the house again...I'm down to my "I need to do laundry" shirts.

I graduated...from American School High School, a correspondence school, when I was 16.

I hope...that my kids are happy and that they have fond memories of their childhood and that they can forgive me for my imperfections.

I want... my baby to feel better, my laundry to be done and my husband to get home from his meeting.

I sometimes...blow things WAY out of proportion. More so when I am tired. Ask Dad...he'll tell you.

I always...manage to forget which side I last nursed the baby on and have to ask Dad if he remembers where I finished.

I can...have my children bathed, brushed, read to, prayed over and in bed in thirty minutes or less.

I work...really hard to keep this place presentable and all it takes is three seconds for my kids to make it look like a WalMart truck exploded in here.

I cannot...imagine what I would do if I wasn't here being the Mom.

I avoid...the heat at all costs. I HATE sweat. HATE it. So gross. It's going to make my plan to go to the gym come January a little rough.

I will...now get off my butt and make some dinner before the hungered masses start to freak out.


And there are more things than you probably ever wanted to know about me.

Tee Hee

I've been invited to hang out with people WAY cooler than me...



And I can't wait!I was totally jealous of the awesome box my friend Sami got a while back.

Follow the link for all the rules...then join up so I don't have to be the only clueless idiot bugging the heck out of Mamarazzi by not reading all the directions. In true Mom fashion I'm just bound and determined to dork myself right out of the cool crowd. Hopefully I can wow the socks off of my swap partner...unless the cool kids don't wear socks.

First Week Of School Top Ten

It's finally over. The week I had been looking forward too all summer. It came. It flew by. And it totally kicked my butt. Here are the top ten memorable moments of the week...

1. Pinky reporting to us that all the boys in her class think that she's the cutest girl and her teacher thinks she's the smartest. Ummm...yeah. She's got some good self esteem there.

2. Stinky's new teacher letting him borrow a copy of the second Diary Of A Wimpy kid book. I kid you not he read WHILE walking down the street on the way home. I had to tell him to put the book away to keep him from running into another mailbox.

3. An afternoon out with a fabulous friend. It's been too long since I got out of the house. I also learned that I find McDonald's much more tolerable when I only have to pay to feed one child there. I kid you not I haven't gone anywhere with all the kids by myself YET. My cowardice kept me home all summer long. There were just too many of them and I was just too afraid. And it was hot. And I was tired.

4. Watching Ralph run to give the big kids a hug when we picked them up. It was almost enough to make the "Meanest Mom in the whole Universe!" cry. (Title generously bestowed on me by Ralph himself. Why settle for just this planet, right? Reach for the stars!)

5. Ralph finding an empty K2 wrapper in the bushes where we waited for the kids. Less than a block from the elementary school doors. Yeah. So not cool. Come on guys. This place is like Mayberry! After reading about all the local places that were working on legislation to make it illegal I opted to call and leave a message at the Police Department. I shall now refer to the local latch key kids as the local synthetic potheads.

6. Wishing I had a camera to capture the image of my three monsters walking, in front of me and the stroller, down the sidewalk. Ralph in the middle looking up at the two big kids while they told him about their day at school. That image will be forever burned in my brain...it was one of those moments when everything slows down and life is perfect.

7. Dad forgetting that he was supposed to come home a bit early on Monday to meet the monsters at the school to walk home with them, just to make sure we all knew where we are going; thus forcing me to frantically stuff Booger Head into the stroller and run, literally, dragging the stroller and carrying all 28.5lbs of Ralph on my hip while racing to the school in my favorite flip flops to pick up my children so they wouldn't think their parents had forgotten them. Let me tell ya, flip flops were not meant for sprinting. Grandpa used to forget to pick me up from school...it must be a guy thing.

8. Getting up each morning, like a good Mom would, and packing my kids each a homemade lunch, doing Pinky's hair and being all awake when they left for school. And then having Pinky inform me that she threw away the _________ I put in her lunch today because she didn't want it. Nice. Starving kids in Africa Pinky...starving kids.

9. The return of "it's a school night" seven-thirty bedtime. And there was much rejoicing! Oh how I love bedtime and not having to wait until nine for it makes me love it even more.

10. Now before I tell you the last item that makes my list I should remind you that I have OCD...so don't judge me. It's...the paperwork. I know. It's a sickness. I just love it when it's all filled out all neatly, with all the info in all the boxes...it makes me happy to have it there all ready to return the very next day. And the fact that there are now two sets, and they are both filled out neatly and the info is all there and most of it matches...ahhh. Happiness. Shut up. I never said I wasn't crazy. And if you think I'm bad you should meet my Grandmother. She owns the patent on crazy.

An Open Letter

Dear Graco,

I realize that you are a huge, multi-million dollar corporation and that the problems of one exhausted housewife don't rank very high on your list of ways to make even more money things that matter, but I would like to point out what I feel is a gross lack of give a crap caring in your customer service department.

I've owned more than several of your products over the years and the four babies and never had any problems with any of them until about a week ago when my Lovin' Hug Swing motor died. Both my teeny monster and myself were devastated. How were we ever going to sleep again? We tried a couple different fixes for the problem, including a friend's swing, and nothing came close to the swinging wonderfulness we had experienced with our Graco swing. After finally locating the model and serial numbers, which were stuck to the bottom of the tray by the way--a really stupid place to put them, we ordered a new motor assembly from your website. And there was much rejoicing. We were led to believe that 3-10 business days from then we would be swinging once more. But this was not the case...

I waited, and waited, and waited some more but three days went by and I hadn't received an email stating that the much needed part was in the mail. Have you ever tried to use a swing that was missing it's motor arm? It's not easy. My three year old got desperate enough for an end to the whining and brought his tools to the living room to see if maybe he could fix it, but no amount of plastic hammering or sawing could make the swing go without it's motor arm. And so I called...and I spoke with a nice woman whose name now escapes me; had she said it slower and followed it with some along the lines of "What can I do to help you today?" I might have been able to remember it. I tried to be nice and reminded myself that it was not her fault that I was tired...it was really, really hard.

I explained my situation and she pulled up my order. I was then informed that the part I had ordered had, sometime between when I ordered it and when I called, gone on back-order. Yes I know. I got your email. What? You didn't send me an email to let me know that I was never going to get to sleep again? Ahhh. I see. Your helpful and compassionate agent then proceeded to remind me that I would get an email when said product had shipped and since I had not yet received such an email that meant the product had not shipped yet. Perhaps you should train your employees in the sometimes subtle differences between tired and stupid. I covered for you this time and told her I was the former and not the latter.

Serendipitously the very part I had been waiting for had just become available again that very morning. Now here's where another company, let's say Fisher Price-just for fun, would have demonstrated the correct method of customer handling in this situation. "We just got them in this morning. I'll get one out to you today and you should be receiving it in the next day or two." Instead your concerned and sympathetic agent informed me that it should ship in the next 2-3 days and I should be receiving it in 3-10 more business days. I waited for her to say something that would make me not hate you as a corporation anymore but nothing came. I felt like I had inconvenienced her in some great way by calling. I'm not familiar with soap opera schedules, perhaps I called during Days of Our Lives?

At any rate I feel that I should remind you that your customer base consists largely of parents, who are tired and need SOMEBODY to give a crap about how just tired they are, apologize at least once for the fact that YOUR product is responsible for their lack of sleep and to at least attempt to convey a sense of empathy when you are called on to rectify the situation. I would also like to inform you that if the swing motor at the heart of this matter is not in my possession this time next week that I will be very unhappy and very tired and cannot guarantee that I will not do something rash...say replace the whole @#$% swing. With one made by another company...let's say Fisher Price. Just for fun.

Sincerely,

Mom
(and Booger Head)

Embrace the Camera 3

Just for you, hot off the press...here's me and Ralph. Taken literally two seconds ago. He's such a cute little turd.