I am really disappointed in you today. I used to really like you. But until the television season starts back up again you really don't have anything special to offer, you're no different from any other day. So I guess you can see why the way you presented yourself is totally unacceptable. If you can't get your act together I may not be able to see you anymore. And since the mattress and I aren't on the best of terms anymore I'd really hate to see that happen. So please, for both our sakes (not to mention the children) let's try to do better next week.
-Mom
PS-If you could put in a good word for me with Friday I would really appreciate it.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Thursday, September 1, 2011
3 for Thursday
Thanks to Evelyn for giving me the push I needed to do this today...
Three accomplishments that I have under my belt:
1. Dad and I are approaching our 10th anniversary.
2. This month alone I am throwing one baby shower, making invitations for another, making two Christmas stockings for a friend, starting a pre-school co-op with this fun lady, starting volunteering at the school again...
3. I bought a curling iron and used it without burning myself.
Three things that my grandma and I have in common: (I'm gonna go with Great Grandma here...)
1. We both think her daughter is a little unbalanced.
2. A love of reading.
3. We both love getting letters from each other in the mail.
Three plans for Labor Day:
1. Not getting up at 6:30am to get monsters ready for school
2. Recover my kitchen chairs. Hopefully. Dang kids.
3. Drive an hour to the Scout Store to stock up on awards for Pack Meeting next week.
Three ridiculous things I have spent money on:
1. Shoes that I can't wear because I have crappy feet.
2. Cat toys, and a cat bed, that my cat doesn't even look at when she walks past them.
3. I'm going to agree with Evelyn on this last one. Dumb boys in High School. I could just smack my 16 year old self.
Three things that only time will fix:
1. I like to think that someday I will be well rested...
2. Hopefully our finances.
3. My calendar. Counting down to the end of soccer, again.
Three pictures:
Three accomplishments that I have under my belt:
1. Dad and I are approaching our 10th anniversary.
2. This month alone I am throwing one baby shower, making invitations for another, making two Christmas stockings for a friend, starting a pre-school co-op with this fun lady, starting volunteering at the school again...
3. I bought a curling iron and used it without burning myself.
Three things that my grandma and I have in common: (I'm gonna go with Great Grandma here...)
1. We both think her daughter is a little unbalanced.
2. A love of reading.
3. We both love getting letters from each other in the mail.
Three plans for Labor Day:
1. Not getting up at 6:30am to get monsters ready for school
2. Recover my kitchen chairs. Hopefully. Dang kids.
3. Drive an hour to the Scout Store to stock up on awards for Pack Meeting next week.
Three ridiculous things I have spent money on:
1. Shoes that I can't wear because I have crappy feet.
2. Cat toys, and a cat bed, that my cat doesn't even look at when she walks past them.
3. I'm going to agree with Evelyn on this last one. Dumb boys in High School. I could just smack my 16 year old self.
Three things that only time will fix:
1. I like to think that someday I will be well rested...
2. Hopefully our finances.
3. My calendar. Counting down to the end of soccer, again.
Three pictures:
Glorious, homemade, Oreos. Mmmm.
Stinky playing games on Dad's Zune while waiting for the dentist. When I took Ralph we watched Muppet videos on YouTube on my phone... not sure what we would do with the kids without the aid of electronics sometimes.
Baby Booger Head back on his birthday. *Sniff sniff* The little turd is growing up way to fast.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Tap Tap Tap
Is this thing still on? Hello?
Okay so I suck.
No surprise there right.
It was hot. Like record breaking hot... but I guess I don't have to tell you because it was hot wherever you are too. Ugh.
We had a crazy busy summer. Which was TOTALLY different from last summer when we didn't go anywhere because Booger Head was brand new and I was too afraid of having four kids to go out in public.
In June Stinky got baptized. It's a big deal and we are so proud of him and the sharp young man he is growing up to be.
My parents flew out just eight days after my poor Mom had abdominal surgery. Dad's folks and his two single siblings came, along with one of his younger brothers and his family (see the previous post for pictures of a cute baby that does not belong to me). We had a lot of people here. Not HERE here... because we haven't the space to house them all. My folks stayed HERE here a couple nights but when everybody got here they all stayed at a hotel down the street... which was less than pleasant for my parents. Sorry guys.
We all sweated our way through a week of Twilight Camp with the Cub Scouts, of which Dad is the Cub Master and I am now the Committee Chair. At a local park, from 5-9pm every night, for a whole week. I only suffered two nights but Dad and the big kids suffered all week... it was hot. But not as hot as it was about to get I guess... and the kids had a good time. And that's what matters.
July was a bit easier. Sort of. We had less stuff planned I think...
We started teaching the monsters to swim using this program. Our little neighborhood pool is 4 feet at it's deepest but Stinky and Pinky are paddling around like pros. They've finished level two and we'll move on to real strokes as soon as soccer is over... more on that later. Ralph won't put his face in the water. But he also won't stay on the stairs or in the shallow part (6 inches I think) and it makes me nervous and he ends up in trouble... grrr. Booger Head LOVES the pool but hates the baby floatie. He wants to bob around but you have to hold him, and if you try to get him to float on his back he'll freak out and try to pull all the skin off of your neck.
We also started working with the older two monsters on bike riding. Yes. We suck and neither my 8 year old or my 6.5 year old knew how to ride a bike before this summer. It's hot here. And I don't like sweating. Pinky took to it really fast and Stinky was just a few days behind her. They were both doing great. And then Dad pretended that he was a third of each his weight and age and tried to pedal Stinky's bike up the driveway and into the garage and snapped the crankarm right off. So now we wait for the bike to get fixed. Stinky has since told him, more than once, "next time you want to show me something on the bike, get your own."
We continued with bike riding and swimming in August and signed the three older monsters up for soccer. Again. Because some people never learn. But this season is going to be extra fun...
Extra Fun
Serves 6
3 young soccer players, 2 of which are old enough to practice twice a week.
1 Dad who is assistant coaching at least one of the teams.
2 fields where games will be played, located 10-15 minutes away from each other.
At least three games every weekend, sometimes four.
One car.
One Mom who hates sweat and parking at the soccer field.
One Booger Head who will be drug along for the ride.
Record breaking heat... we're still talking highs of 100-105 here.
Combine and cry for the next 8 weeks.
See? I told you. Extra fun.
Not to mention Soccer Mom Barbie on Pinky's team. "Let's have matching socks! Let's do cute hairbows!" Before she gets any more great ideas I'm just going to say now that I will not be donning a bedazzled shirt ever. for any of my children's extra circular activities. EVER.
It's going to be fun. I can tell already.
Booger Head started walking. And climbing. The little turd. And Mom is one step closer to crazy. It's a good thing he's so cute.
I purchased and cooked, for the first time in my entire life, fish. Salmon to be precise. And it was delicious. Cook it like this (you'll have to scroll a little bit) and serve it with lemon, garlic and dill butter. Your life will never be the same.
And of course back to school... after hours and hours of shopping, washing, packing they are back at school. Here are some things I learned...
Famous Footwear sucks. Crappy store, crappy organization of shoes and crappy selection.
Those prepackaged school supply kits come with a $22ish convenience charge. I only had to hunt down one thing.
First graders are too cool for Disney Princesses.
When the Justin Bieber GT folder vanishes from the backpack that you are SURE you put it in when you bought it, it WILL be all. your. fault. Just like it was when you couldn't find a JB Tshirt. Drama, drama, drama.
Pinky also got glasses this summer... as you can see from the required "On the doorstep on the 1st day of school" picture...
I hope you're all enjoying the return of regular naps :)
Okay so I suck.
No surprise there right.
It was hot. Like record breaking hot... but I guess I don't have to tell you because it was hot wherever you are too. Ugh.
We had a crazy busy summer. Which was TOTALLY different from last summer when we didn't go anywhere because Booger Head was brand new and I was too afraid of having four kids to go out in public.
In June Stinky got baptized. It's a big deal and we are so proud of him and the sharp young man he is growing up to be.
My parents flew out just eight days after my poor Mom had abdominal surgery. Dad's folks and his two single siblings came, along with one of his younger brothers and his family (see the previous post for pictures of a cute baby that does not belong to me). We had a lot of people here. Not HERE here... because we haven't the space to house them all. My folks stayed HERE here a couple nights but when everybody got here they all stayed at a hotel down the street... which was less than pleasant for my parents. Sorry guys.
We all sweated our way through a week of Twilight Camp with the Cub Scouts, of which Dad is the Cub Master and I am now the Committee Chair. At a local park, from 5-9pm every night, for a whole week. I only suffered two nights but Dad and the big kids suffered all week... it was hot. But not as hot as it was about to get I guess... and the kids had a good time. And that's what matters.
July was a bit easier. Sort of. We had less stuff planned I think...
We started teaching the monsters to swim using this program. Our little neighborhood pool is 4 feet at it's deepest but Stinky and Pinky are paddling around like pros. They've finished level two and we'll move on to real strokes as soon as soccer is over... more on that later. Ralph won't put his face in the water. But he also won't stay on the stairs or in the shallow part (6 inches I think) and it makes me nervous and he ends up in trouble... grrr. Booger Head LOVES the pool but hates the baby floatie. He wants to bob around but you have to hold him, and if you try to get him to float on his back he'll freak out and try to pull all the skin off of your neck.
We also started working with the older two monsters on bike riding. Yes. We suck and neither my 8 year old or my 6.5 year old knew how to ride a bike before this summer. It's hot here. And I don't like sweating. Pinky took to it really fast and Stinky was just a few days behind her. They were both doing great. And then Dad pretended that he was a third of each his weight and age and tried to pedal Stinky's bike up the driveway and into the garage and snapped the crankarm right off. So now we wait for the bike to get fixed. Stinky has since told him, more than once, "next time you want to show me something on the bike, get your own."
We continued with bike riding and swimming in August and signed the three older monsters up for soccer. Again. Because some people never learn. But this season is going to be extra fun...
Extra Fun
Serves 6
3 young soccer players, 2 of which are old enough to practice twice a week.
1 Dad who is assistant coaching at least one of the teams.
2 fields where games will be played, located 10-15 minutes away from each other.
At least three games every weekend, sometimes four.
One car.
One Mom who hates sweat and parking at the soccer field.
One Booger Head who will be drug along for the ride.
Record breaking heat... we're still talking highs of 100-105 here.
Combine and cry for the next 8 weeks.
See? I told you. Extra fun.
Not to mention Soccer Mom Barbie on Pinky's team. "Let's have matching socks! Let's do cute hairbows!" Before she gets any more great ideas I'm just going to say now that I will not be donning a bedazzled shirt ever. for any of my children's extra circular activities. EVER.
It's going to be fun. I can tell already.
Booger Head started walking. And climbing. The little turd. And Mom is one step closer to crazy. It's a good thing he's so cute.
I purchased and cooked, for the first time in my entire life, fish. Salmon to be precise. And it was delicious. Cook it like this (you'll have to scroll a little bit) and serve it with lemon, garlic and dill butter. Your life will never be the same.
And of course back to school... after hours and hours of shopping, washing, packing they are back at school. Here are some things I learned...
Famous Footwear sucks. Crappy store, crappy organization of shoes and crappy selection.
Those prepackaged school supply kits come with a $22ish convenience charge. I only had to hunt down one thing.
First graders are too cool for Disney Princesses.
When the Justin Bieber GT folder vanishes from the backpack that you are SURE you put it in when you bought it, it WILL be all. your. fault. Just like it was when you couldn't find a JB Tshirt. Drama, drama, drama.
Pinky also got glasses this summer... as you can see from the required "On the doorstep on the 1st day of school" picture...
I hope you're all enjoying the return of regular naps :)
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Hey! Remember That Blog I Used to Have?
What could be a more perfect way to come back than with the first item on Evelyn's Three for Thursday prompt list?
Three excuses...
I'm tired.
It's summer "vacation."
I have four monsters who kept me INSANELY busy between the middle of May and the end of June. Perhaps we'll cover all that another day... And then I took a week, or two, to try and recover and instead of relaxing I got sucked into some furniture refinishing/decorating projects. The results of which are AMAZING.
See...
I eat meat and drink milk. A few years back my Mom was diagnosed with Type II Diabetes and after some time on meds and being unhappy with how they worked and didn't work, and how she felt while she was one them, she decided to try adopting a mostly vegan diet. It worked and her blood sugar has stabilized and she's gone off all of her diabetes meds. She has a lot more willpower than me.
Three Things I Am Waiting For...
5pm. When Dad will be home.
Ed McMahon to show up at my door with one of those big checks.
August 22, when my house will be significantly quieter during the day.
Three Things I Want To Be When I Grow Up...
Skinny
Well Rested
Content
Three Things I Do Because They Are Good For Me
and NOT Because I Like Doing Them...
Give up caffeine... again.
Floss. It's just gross.
Wear fancy flip flops that don't make my feet hurt and never wear cute shoes anywhere any more. (I can't even begin to tell you how sick it made me to spend that kind of money on flip flops but they are one of 2 pairs of shoes I own that do not make my feet hurt so bad I can't stand up in the morning. Yay for Plantar Fasciitis!)
Three Things I Appreciate About My Middle Child,
or Middle Sibling...
I have no middle child. But I have a brother who is the middle of three and the only boy...
He is HILARIOUS. With a capital "H."
He works really, really hard.
He's one of those easy going, easy to talk to type guys and it's really cute to watch him interact with my kids.
Yeah, he and his girlfriend Maren are those annoyingly photogenic type people. Seriously. Every picture they take is this cute.
Three Truths About Me...
I care what you think. But not enough to change me.
I'm not one of those people who think all children are adorable. I love mine, I like yours, but the rest of them...
I'm largely unmotivated. Which is why my house is always half way clean and my laundry is always half way done.
Three Pictures...
Three excuses...
I'm tired.
It's summer "vacation."
I have four monsters who kept me INSANELY busy between the middle of May and the end of June. Perhaps we'll cover all that another day... And then I took a week, or two, to try and recover and instead of relaxing I got sucked into some furniture refinishing/decorating projects. The results of which are AMAZING.
See...
And... (x3)
Pretty dang snazzy, huh?
Three favorite children's books...
Any of the Elephant and Piggie books by Mo Willems
17 Things I Am Not Allowed To Do Anymore by Jenny Offill
Oh The Places You'll Go by Dr. Suess
Three Decorating Styles I Like...
Ummm...
Good Looking & Inexpensive. My living room furniture came from Big Lots. We paid less than $800 for the sofa, loveseat, and rocker recliner combined. I have kids. Four of them. There is no point in shelling out big bucks for stuff they are just going to ruin. This looks decent and it won't hurt as much when we throw it upstairs with the kids when we get in a new place.
I like clean lines and simple patterns. I can't stand over done, ornate, carved and blinged-up, crap. It's just gross.
I want my house to look like the kind of place where real people live comfortably. Not some catalog picture or Parade of Homes type palace.
Three Things I Do Differently Than My Mother...
I sleep in. My mom in an awesome nurse/nursing instructor and she gets up at all kinds of ungodly hours for work and school things. Aside from all the blood and other nasty crap, "early" is another reason I could never be a nurse.
I turn the thermostat down and I leave the ceiling fan on high year round. My poor Mom is always cold when she comes to my house and I'm always melting when I go to her house.I eat meat and drink milk. A few years back my Mom was diagnosed with Type II Diabetes and after some time on meds and being unhappy with how they worked and didn't work, and how she felt while she was one them, she decided to try adopting a mostly vegan diet. It worked and her blood sugar has stabilized and she's gone off all of her diabetes meds. She has a lot more willpower than me.
Three Things I Am Waiting For...
5pm. When Dad will be home.
Ed McMahon to show up at my door with one of those big checks.
August 22, when my house will be significantly quieter during the day.
Three Things I Want To Be When I Grow Up...
Skinny
Well Rested
Content
Three Things I Do Because They Are Good For Me
and NOT Because I Like Doing Them...
Give up caffeine... again.
Floss. It's just gross.
Wear fancy flip flops that don't make my feet hurt and never wear cute shoes anywhere any more. (I can't even begin to tell you how sick it made me to spend that kind of money on flip flops but they are one of 2 pairs of shoes I own that do not make my feet hurt so bad I can't stand up in the morning. Yay for Plantar Fasciitis!)
Three Things I Appreciate About My Middle Child,
or Middle Sibling...
I have no middle child. But I have a brother who is the middle of three and the only boy...
He is HILARIOUS. With a capital "H."
He works really, really hard.
He's one of those easy going, easy to talk to type guys and it's really cute to watch him interact with my kids.
Yeah, he and his girlfriend Maren are those annoyingly photogenic type people. Seriously. Every picture they take is this cute.
Three Truths About Me...
I care what you think. But not enough to change me.
I'm not one of those people who think all children are adorable. I love mine, I like yours, but the rest of them...
I'm largely unmotivated. Which is why my house is always half way clean and my laundry is always half way done.
Three Pictures...
My monsters with their adorable cousin Kayli.
Booger Head at the sprinkler park.
We had some new family pictures done the beginning part of June and this was the winner in the "Shot of Monsters Together" category. We bought these stupid balloons thinking, "We can pretend to be those people! Sure bring on the balloons!" Before we had even taken a picture Stinky had lost two and popped one. So here you have...Pinky watching the two balloons floating off into the atmosphere while mourning the loss of her favorite orange balloon, Stinky pouting because he lost his balloon holding privileges, and Ralph trying to keep Booger Head from stealing his balloon. Booger Head's balloon was tied to the back of his overalls. Awesome. The amazing Keli White captured them perfectly.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Three for Thursday
Thanks to the fabulous Evelyn, who's amazingness knows no bounds. Go pay her a visit!
1. Three favorite words
According to the word counter thing on Facebook they are... Really. Baby. Kids.
I wasn't surprised by Really... but I expected Seriously and Crap to be on the list... or Naptime and Treat.
2. Three things that won’t be allowed in heaven
Hmmmm... I'm going to go with whining, lying and messy bedrooms.
3. Three crafty things I do
I don't know... I do a lot of crafty things. I like to think I am pretty good and figuring out how to do stuff. I've made stamped necklaces... I can cross stitch... I like making cards and invitations but never have time and never send out homemade ones. Not because there is anything wrong with homemade cards but because I never remember that I have them and I like to send out funny cards.
4. Three things I swore I would NEVER do when I became a parent, but now find myself doing.
This feels like the kind of question that could get me in trouble with my Mother, who was/is awesome. :)
When I was a kid I swore I would never... make my kids do chores. Haha. Two days ago I had Stinky taking out all the garbage in the house. SCORE! I said I would never... take my kids out in public looking like orphans. There have been times when I was sure we would end up on People of Walmart. And Pinky's hair is usually the subject of much stress for me when we are heading out the door. I said I would never... let my baby crawl around and eat stuff off of the floor. Ugh. The kid is killing me. In the words of Dad, "Did it used to be food? Then I don't care if he eats it." The kitchen gets swept daily but it takes Booger Head about two seconds to cover it with a thin layer of cheerios or mashmallow mateys (hooray for fluorescent marshmallows on your feet!). He put it there, let him eat it.
5. Three favorite quotes
Being a mother is like being pecked to death by a duck.
"My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?" -Erma Bombeck (she is hilarious, with a capital "H")
"If it's not broken it's probably not ours." Which I think I heard was Shaq's Mom.
6. Three names I would never dream of giving my children
Chastity Come on, you're just asking for it... Blanket A blanket is a child's possession. Not a child. Idiot... Brittany I've known too many of them who were... something that rhymes with itchy.7. Three things I plan to do for Memorial Day weekend
Sleep in. That is, of course, assuming Dad gets to stay home instead of working to meet a deadline. Eat food. Hopefully good food... but I haven't even begun to plan that menu. Lament the end of school night bedtime. My kids are out of school tomorrow... sigh. So there will probably be some kind of movie night which will result in Dad and I staying up late to clean up the popcorn that will no doubt be all over the living room.
8. Three blogs I love to visit
Pioneer Woman... Everybody loves her and everything she cooks looks amazing.
AnyMommy... I love that she is willing to admit that she runs out of nice sometimes too.
The Meanest Mom... Seriously. She's hilarious.
9. Three things that make my husband/partner the luckiest man alive
So we're to the "toot your own horn" part of blogging...
I'm cheap. I hate paying a lot for things so when I do buy stuff it's almost always on sale and I may have a coupon and if it's online I'll look for a coupon code. And if I hate it I take it back. I'm not one of those women who buy lots of expensive designer stuff and make it so we can't afford groceries.
I cook. On average I would say 6 times a week. Seriously. There are weeks where we go out more than that but they are few and far between. And I'm a good cook. My mom taught me well.
I cook. On average I would say 6 times a week. Seriously. There are weeks where we go out more than that but they are few and far between. And I'm a good cook. My mom taught me well.
I get a babysitter fairly regularly so we can go on a date. LOVE date night! So I guess he's lucky that I like to spend time with him :)
10. Three Pictures
You're in luck. I just found my camera this morning.
My poor baby has terrible, lazy parents who hadn't take him to the park EVER until last week. Yeah. He's one and this is his first time in a baby bucket swing. Nice one Mom and Dad.
A sweet baby and an ice cream sammich. Num nummy...
Stinky at his 2nd Grade awards assembly this morning. I can't believe the big turd is already so old. I'm not old. Just him. He's old.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
You Can Make It! Freezer Jam Tutorial
I apologize for my bloggy absence. I blame blogger. I wanted to make sure they had their act together before I spent any more time doing this.
So. Jam. :)
I've been watching and waiting for the strawberries to hit $1 per pound. I'd almost given up. The last container of jam from last season was in the fridge and I was worried I would either have to go back to store bought slime or pay way too much for strawberries. And I'd rather pay too much for berries. Then there they were! WOOHOO! As soon as they are $1 per pound I buy at least a dozen, sometimes two dozen, and make jam.
Between the two of us Sam and I processed about 36 lbs of berries in to about 92 cups of delicious homemade jam in about 3.5 hours. Time consuming? Maybe. Worth it. ABSOLUTELY. Of course you don't have to work in such huge quantities but since each of us have four small monsters and half of them pack lunch to school each day we go through jam at a pretty rapid click...
Okay, here we go...
You'll need fruit. In this instance we used strawberries. I've done raspberries (delicious and super easy-wash and mash and you're ready), kiwis (which will make a six year old girl cry because they make green jam. Go figure. Kiwi jam also doesn't set as firmly as some of the others. But it's still good), peaches (SOOOO much work. Peeling, pitting and chopping, but still so much better than store bought), and plums (which I did not peel, just pitted and chopped and it was really good). You're really only limited by your imagination here. Raspberry-Peach jam is good, so is Strawberry-Kiwi. I saw a recipe somewhere for Pineapple Upside-Down Cake jam and it looked amazing... So obtain fruit...
Did you know that large amounts of unprocessed strawberries will make your house smell less like a strawberry field than you might think? The smell is much closer to fruity diapers. You parents know what a I mean... it's kind of gross until you start chopping.
How much fruit you need depends on how much jam you intent to make, which is a decision shaped by how much of this you have on hand.
This is the instant stuff, which means no cooking. Cooking jam sucks. It's hot and sticky and gross. I accidentally bought the wrong pectin once and it was a mistake I will never make again. This jam cannot be set on a shelf in the pantry, it has to be kept cold. The pectin you buy is boss. Follow the directions and measurements on the package. These directions are only good for this product.
If you use the packets you'll need around two pounds per packet, and it'll make a hair more than 2c. of jam. If you use the big jar you can triple the batch each time (doing more than that could jeopardize the "set" of your jam) and you'll need around six pounds and you'll end up with about 7c. of jam. If you're going to make a lot skip the packets, they're a pain and the jars are sealed tighter so there are no pectin lumps.
Containers. This is freezer jam, so something with a good seal is important. That being said they don't have to be expensive. I like these, but they are sort hard to find. (They also make them half that size but like I said, we go through it fast.) When I can't find them I use the ziploc twist n seal type containers. Anything with a good seal is fine. Swish them around in hot soapy water and leave them on a towel to dry while you get started.
Sam and I were able to determine that for large batch jam processing it's better to have a team of three. Some one to wash and chop, some one to ladle jam into containers and set up for the next batch, and someone to stir.
So wash and chop your berries. They don't have to be super small, just halved or quartered if they are huge mutant berries.
Sam is a blur of motion.
I like to run mine through the food processor because I hate huge chunks in my jam almost as much as I hate huge nuts in my brownies. But feel free to use a potato masher on yours... chop or mash or whatever until you have the necessary amount of fruit for the batch you are doing, the measurements are on the pectin container. Always follow the measurements on the container you are holding in YOUR hand.
So, chop berries. Not into soup, some chunks are good.
Now get your pectin and sugar set up in one bowl and the appropriate amount of prepared fruit into another bowl.
This you can do one of two ways. I'm here to tell you that it doesn't matter which you pour into where. I opted to pour the fruit into the pectin/sugar mix here because that bowl was bigger, but I tried it the other way around too and it made no difference in the finished product. (Please note that the pectin and sugar are not mixed together in the above picture, they should be before you dump the fruit and you need to make sure than any pectin lumps have been obliterated.)
Now dump and stir.
This part went a lot faster after we made Dad help us. The package I had said to stir for three minutes, but follow the directions on your package. Jam making totally counts as exercise. Your arms will hurt tomorrow.
After stirring for however long the pectin says to ladle your jam into your clean containers.
Lid them up and let them sit for however long the pectin says to before putting them in the freezer. Yes, I usually put one straight into the fridge but don't eat it until the next day. Give it time to get totally set.
Again, you don't have to make this much. Six pounds of strawberries fill three and half of the containers with the green lids.
Admire your handiwork. Thanks to you when the world ends you'll be able to trade some jam with some of those people who store wheat. Everybody wins. :)
Yes, this is my only freezer. And yes, the top shelf is often full of jam.
Things to remember...
1. No matter what measurements or whatever I gave here the container of pectin you buy and hold in your hand is boss. Unless you have the exact same thing follow those directions and measurements.
2. Not all pectins are alike. Make sure you know what you are buying. I like this stuff... look for the words instant, and freezer. I got it at WalMart over by the kitchen stuff, not the grocery section... usually some where close to the aisle with the tupperware.
3. Buy more containers than you think you'll need. You can always return them later. Having to run to the store at 11:30 to buy more will totally cramp your jammy style. A triple batch makes about seven cups... plan accordingly.
4. This is easy. If you can cut, measure and stir you can do it.
5. Store bought jam, even the expensive kind, is gross. And this has WAY less sugar.
6. Yes, you can do this with Splenda BUT it won't set as firmly as the full sugar kind.
7. This is good on everything. Ice cream, cottage cheese... Mmmm.
Now. Go forth! Make jam! And let me know how it goes :)
So. Jam. :)
I've been watching and waiting for the strawberries to hit $1 per pound. I'd almost given up. The last container of jam from last season was in the fridge and I was worried I would either have to go back to store bought slime or pay way too much for strawberries. And I'd rather pay too much for berries. Then there they were! WOOHOO! As soon as they are $1 per pound I buy at least a dozen, sometimes two dozen, and make jam.
Between the two of us Sam and I processed about 36 lbs of berries in to about 92 cups of delicious homemade jam in about 3.5 hours. Time consuming? Maybe. Worth it. ABSOLUTELY. Of course you don't have to work in such huge quantities but since each of us have four small monsters and half of them pack lunch to school each day we go through jam at a pretty rapid click...
Okay, here we go...
You'll need fruit. In this instance we used strawberries. I've done raspberries (delicious and super easy-wash and mash and you're ready), kiwis (which will make a six year old girl cry because they make green jam. Go figure. Kiwi jam also doesn't set as firmly as some of the others. But it's still good), peaches (SOOOO much work. Peeling, pitting and chopping, but still so much better than store bought), and plums (which I did not peel, just pitted and chopped and it was really good). You're really only limited by your imagination here. Raspberry-Peach jam is good, so is Strawberry-Kiwi. I saw a recipe somewhere for Pineapple Upside-Down Cake jam and it looked amazing... So obtain fruit...
Did you know that large amounts of unprocessed strawberries will make your house smell less like a strawberry field than you might think? The smell is much closer to fruity diapers. You parents know what a I mean... it's kind of gross until you start chopping.
How much fruit you need depends on how much jam you intent to make, which is a decision shaped by how much of this you have on hand.
This is the instant stuff, which means no cooking. Cooking jam sucks. It's hot and sticky and gross. I accidentally bought the wrong pectin once and it was a mistake I will never make again. This jam cannot be set on a shelf in the pantry, it has to be kept cold. The pectin you buy is boss. Follow the directions and measurements on the package. These directions are only good for this product.
If you use the packets you'll need around two pounds per packet, and it'll make a hair more than 2c. of jam. If you use the big jar you can triple the batch each time (doing more than that could jeopardize the "set" of your jam) and you'll need around six pounds and you'll end up with about 7c. of jam. If you're going to make a lot skip the packets, they're a pain and the jars are sealed tighter so there are no pectin lumps.
Containers. This is freezer jam, so something with a good seal is important. That being said they don't have to be expensive. I like these, but they are sort hard to find. (They also make them half that size but like I said, we go through it fast.) When I can't find them I use the ziploc twist n seal type containers. Anything with a good seal is fine. Swish them around in hot soapy water and leave them on a towel to dry while you get started.
Sam and I were able to determine that for large batch jam processing it's better to have a team of three. Some one to wash and chop, some one to ladle jam into containers and set up for the next batch, and someone to stir.
So wash and chop your berries. They don't have to be super small, just halved or quartered if they are huge mutant berries.
Sam is a blur of motion.
I like to run mine through the food processor because I hate huge chunks in my jam almost as much as I hate huge nuts in my brownies. But feel free to use a potato masher on yours... chop or mash or whatever until you have the necessary amount of fruit for the batch you are doing, the measurements are on the pectin container. Always follow the measurements on the container you are holding in YOUR hand.
So, chop berries. Not into soup, some chunks are good.
Now get your pectin and sugar set up in one bowl and the appropriate amount of prepared fruit into another bowl.
This you can do one of two ways. I'm here to tell you that it doesn't matter which you pour into where. I opted to pour the fruit into the pectin/sugar mix here because that bowl was bigger, but I tried it the other way around too and it made no difference in the finished product. (Please note that the pectin and sugar are not mixed together in the above picture, they should be before you dump the fruit and you need to make sure than any pectin lumps have been obliterated.)
Now dump and stir.
This part went a lot faster after we made Dad help us. The package I had said to stir for three minutes, but follow the directions on your package. Jam making totally counts as exercise. Your arms will hurt tomorrow.
After stirring for however long the pectin says to ladle your jam into your clean containers.
Lid them up and let them sit for however long the pectin says to before putting them in the freezer. Yes, I usually put one straight into the fridge but don't eat it until the next day. Give it time to get totally set.
Again, you don't have to make this much. Six pounds of strawberries fill three and half of the containers with the green lids.
Admire your handiwork. Thanks to you when the world ends you'll be able to trade some jam with some of those people who store wheat. Everybody wins. :)
Yes, this is my only freezer. And yes, the top shelf is often full of jam.
Things to remember...
1. No matter what measurements or whatever I gave here the container of pectin you buy and hold in your hand is boss. Unless you have the exact same thing follow those directions and measurements.
2. Not all pectins are alike. Make sure you know what you are buying. I like this stuff... look for the words instant, and freezer. I got it at WalMart over by the kitchen stuff, not the grocery section... usually some where close to the aisle with the tupperware.
3. Buy more containers than you think you'll need. You can always return them later. Having to run to the store at 11:30 to buy more will totally cramp your jammy style. A triple batch makes about seven cups... plan accordingly.
4. This is easy. If you can cut, measure and stir you can do it.
5. Store bought jam, even the expensive kind, is gross. And this has WAY less sugar.
6. Yes, you can do this with Splenda BUT it won't set as firmly as the full sugar kind.
7. This is good on everything. Ice cream, cottage cheese... Mmmm.
Now. Go forth! Make jam! And let me know how it goes :)
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Three More Things
Again from Evelyn, at Hanging By A Silver Lining, who hates people who only ever do these types of things on their blogs...
Good thing I don't know anyone like that.
Three things that come to my mind immediately. GO!:
1. Butterflies.
2. Chocolate Orange Cake...
3. Rain and snakes and fire ants.
Three things I did instead of blogging this week:
1. Got my permanent crown cemented. Ahhhh. Bye bye tooth pain.
2. Slept on the couch. I haven't been sleeping at night lately. Which has left me totally useless during the day. It sucks.
3. Made lots and lots and lots and lots of Strawberry Freezer Jam... tutorial is coming. You're gonna love it!
Three things I would like to learn how to do:
1. Home can peaches and tomatoes
2. Loosen up and let go. Major control freak here.
3. Spend less than I earn.
Three things that are pressing on my mind:
1. One of the butterflies has a broken wing... I sure hope it flies.
2. Booger Head turns one tomorrow and so far all I've done to prepare for the teeny party is buy a cake mix.
3. Should I move Booger Head's Dr.'s appointment on Monday so I can play with Sam and Bekah on Monday morning instead? I never get to see Bekah anymore...
Three pictures:
Good thing I don't know anyone like that.
Three things that come to my mind immediately. GO!:
1. Butterflies.
2. Chocolate Orange Cake...
3. Rain and snakes and fire ants.
Three things I did instead of blogging this week:
1. Got my permanent crown cemented. Ahhhh. Bye bye tooth pain.
2. Slept on the couch. I haven't been sleeping at night lately. Which has left me totally useless during the day. It sucks.
3. Made lots and lots and lots and lots of Strawberry Freezer Jam... tutorial is coming. You're gonna love it!
Three things I would like to learn how to do:
1. Home can peaches and tomatoes
2. Loosen up and let go. Major control freak here.
3. Spend less than I earn.
Three things that are pressing on my mind:
1. One of the butterflies has a broken wing... I sure hope it flies.
2. Booger Head turns one tomorrow and so far all I've done to prepare for the teeny party is buy a cake mix.
3. Should I move Booger Head's Dr.'s appointment on Monday so I can play with Sam and Bekah on Monday morning instead? I never get to see Bekah anymore...
Three pictures:
Love me some Purple Berri.
"Stop taking my freaking picture and give me a bath!"
So close... and yet, so far away...
Three personal pet peeves I have about blogging:
1. Pictures that aren't rotated. Figure it out or leave it out.
2. Ads and product reviews. I couldn't care less what you think about product X. If I wanted commercials I'd watch TV.
3. "Blah blah blah, now come follow me!" type comments. This here is a "Don't call us, we'll call you" sort of establishment...
Three people I find intriguing:
1. My super cute friend Marnie, who does it all and looks great doing it. I have no idea how she pulls it off. I really miss her cute self.
1. Pictures that aren't rotated. Figure it out or leave it out.
2. Ads and product reviews. I couldn't care less what you think about product X. If I wanted commercials I'd watch TV.
3. "Blah blah blah, now come follow me!" type comments. This here is a "Don't call us, we'll call you" sort of establishment...
Three people I find intriguing:
1. My super cute friend Marnie, who does it all and looks great doing it. I have no idea how she pulls it off. I really miss her cute self.
2. The Fabulous Jessica over at The Lowe Family News... And she's just as fabulous in person and more ballsy and stylish than I could ever hope to be.
3. Pioneer Woman I want to be as awesome as her someday... but with less cow poop.
Three "surprises" I found this week:
1. Wet sheets on Ralph's bed. Surprise!
3. Pioneer Woman I want to be as awesome as her someday... but with less cow poop.
Three "surprises" I found this week:
1. Wet sheets on Ralph's bed. Surprise!
2. We're getting almost $100 from somebody that has something to do with some health thing at Dad's work because we filled out some questionnaires and he talked to a nurse.
3. Stinky was tested for GT this week and apparently it went really well.
Three things I enjoyed about Mother's Day 2011:
1. Stinky brought home an adorable picture from school... with descriptions of my face, arms, etc... including the red marks, bruises, and arms that were "not used for flexing." Love it. Thanks Stinky!
2. Letting someone else juggle my baby during Relief Society. Thanks again Twyla.
3. A Tired Mother's Nap.
Three things I just can't resist:
1. Peanut M&M's
3. Stinky was tested for GT this week and apparently it went really well.
Three things I enjoyed about Mother's Day 2011:
1. Stinky brought home an adorable picture from school... with descriptions of my face, arms, etc... including the red marks, bruises, and arms that were "not used for flexing." Love it. Thanks Stinky!
2. Letting someone else juggle my baby during Relief Society. Thanks again Twyla.
3. A Tired Mother's Nap.
Three things I just can't resist:
1. Peanut M&M's
2. Freshy washed, lotioned, and powdered babies.
3. Those little round Sweet Tart things... bites or whatever they're called. Mmmmm... whole bag, one sitting.
Three things I did for The Jolly Green Giant so far this week:
1. Started following...
3. Those little round Sweet Tart things... bites or whatever they're called. Mmmmm... whole bag, one sitting.
Three things I did for The Jolly Green Giant so far this week:
1. Started following...
2. Wondered if this is going to include homework?
3. Hoped it wouldn't mean I would have to start exercising...
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