Dear Sirs...and Cat

Dear Terminix,

I gotta say guys, I am not impressed. We had Orkin for four years before I got suckered into switching to a different company, that you bought out two weeks after I signed up, and I NEVER had bugs in the house. Ever. This morning alone I have killed two sizable arachnids, bringing the total count of giant spiders in my space in the few weeks we've been back from vacation up to three; which, coincidentally is exactly three spiders over my tolerance level. Last time the #$%& thing rushed me in the bathroom, while I leaned against the counter. It came running out of my husbands towel! Do you have any idea how hard it is to grab a towel off of a towel hook that has so recently been a spider habitat? Or how it bad it makes your arm hurt to shake a towel out while hiding the rest of your body behind a glass shower door?

Until my contract with you is up, in another year, (and I go crawling back to Orkin and beg forgiveness for ever leaving) please get your act together.

Sincerly,
Mom




Dear Pickles,

What the #$%&? Get off your furry butt and take care of the bugs around here would ya? Geez cat...

Serioulsy. I mean now.
Mom